Your Wish Is My Command

I must admit I have been having a little bit of a blog block in these past few days.  In short my life has just been so low key and boring I couldn't dredge up the simplest of things to write about, until today.  After a nice hike through a local natural conservation area with my Sunshine I arrived home, relaxed and realigned with the world and all of nature to see a missed call on the home phone.

Scrolling through the log I saw that the missed call was my mother and immediately called her back.  The phone call started off normal although I did notice an unusually loud din in the background, but I figured she must be out doing errands at a noisy shopping center.  After telling me that one of my relatives who was going through treatment for cancer is now cancer free, she informed me that she was at the lake with her girlfriends.

My mother and her friends at the lake for a husband free weekend always spells trouble, before I knew it my mother was relating how they had all read the blog and had found it extremely humorous.  Boisterous voices chimed in from the background and I began to wonder just what these ladies had been up to all afternoon. 

Suddenly my mother handed the phone off to one of her friends who informed me that they had read through all the posts and thought I had captured the essence of my mother to perfection.  Having lived with her for the past well I decline to state how many years I know the ins and outs of her personality. 

"Your mom says you should do all the posts on the blog since you're so good at it" her friend laughed into the phone.
"She would say that" I blustered "and once I finished she would call and say, that was a nice post I just have a few suggestions about your grammar and well it could be a little funnier" I countered.
"That was hysterical" screeched my mom's friend you even sound like her.

The phone clicked and suddenly the group en mass was on the line.  "Do the impression of her come on" my mom's friend urged.  I froze it's one thing to do the impression of my mom behind her back complete with the right eye fluttering roll that she does when she's really mad.  The kind of mad where the veins bulge out on her neck, her face turns red, and her right eye turns in its socket like a Ferris wheel at the fair. 

It's another thing to do an impression of her when she is on the line.  "Come on Aim I thought you were an actress my mom" chirped.  Tension crackled down the line and only one word can describe how I felt, AWKWARD!  I felt like a five year old at a party trotted out to entertain the crowd.  "I just can't do an impression of you to your face" I stammered "it only works behind your back."

"Great you just keep doing it behind my back" my mom said and with relief gushing through my body we got off the phone so that they could start what I suspect will be a very long journey to Margaritaville.  Now I am no prude, well OK so I kind of am, but I loosen up and have some fun now and then.  However the ruckus my mom and her friends cause is like Golden Girls Gone Wild.

It seems like when she moves to Heir Head Manor in June a few ground rules might have to be laid before this wild girl bunch travels up for one of their husband free melanges.  Like lights out by midnight, one alcoholic beverage per person per day, and most of all when the curtain to my room is closed that means stay out.  Yes mom especially you.